This IS Life

Finally! The worst is finally over. I have been waiting for this day for a long long time and now I can blog without feeling guilty at all!

Firstly, one word to describe the O level. D-I-S-A-S-T-R-O-U-S. Nothing less. The process of it is T-O-R-T-U-R-O-U-S and which I will never want to experience ever again but if I don't have a choice... hmm... IDK.

I put on lots and lots of weight throughout this torturous period and I am worried that I can't fit into a pair of jeans for the HK and Genting trip. So desperate that I went on Google search engine to search for ''How to lose weight fast'' and I happen to be one of the million fat people who search for the same exact thing. Anyway, the fast is not fast enough. I am only left with 7 days. If miracle can happen I would have slim down by now.

I was also looking at some of my friends facebook earlier today and I found out that there is this ''column'' at the profile made to sort of like describe he/herself. Mine was empty and I was thinking about putting up one too and then I came out with this.

I am not just and ordinary girl u see everyday. I am special because I am much fatter than the average girl but that doesn't stop me from dressing myself up. I love to shop but I don't shop at Bugis Street because the sleeves can barely pass my elbow. My favourite pastime is reading but that doesn't mean I am good in English. Last but not least, I love to blog.

After coming up with this shit I realise that its a bit too long and felt that I should just summarize it to. I am fat girl. I shop and blog. But its equally stupid and then I decided to leave it as it is..

Oh and I just had a haircut last two weeks ago. It looks the same as my previous hairstyle but a much shorter version of it. I should have gotten a haircut a long time ago. Short hair is much more manageable. I used to think that long hair can make me look slimmer..cover up my round face but it doesn't really work that way. If you r fat mean u r fat. Nothing is gonna make a difference unless you loss some weight. Soooo sick of having long hair.


Wish I can go on with this post but I'm really sleepy now. 2:30am. Almost forgot how its like staying up late in the night.

Aaaadios

Beginning to get the hang of it...!

Aloha~

I know I shouldn't be wasting precious time now to update my blog but I have decided to reward myself since I finally manage to do the stupid Mole Questions. All thanks to Tan How Sun (it's amazing..so amazing).

Just a few days ago mommy told me that we will be going to HK after my O's. At first I thought we will be going on the Dec but yesterday she told me that they have booked the air tickets and its on the 12 nov. Right after my last paper!!

I am going to miss out all the fun!! What's even worse is that I wouldn't be able to attend my one and only ''graduation party'' (probably my last). zzzzzz

[Well, at least I wouldn't have to embarrass myself. I heard that we have to go on stage and shake hands or something..]

Random-

I can't stand my hair anymore! It is waaaaaaaaaaaaaaay to long already (Covering half of my ass). I really need a hair cut!

Song of the week-
Bohemian Rhapsody

One of the most complex songs on my play list.



Adios~

11 Nov marks the end of my misery..

JIA YOU! Talking to miiself agaiinx.

I am on the verge of breaking down now and I wonder how much more can I take before I really go mad.

Daddy suddenly talked to me about the Genting Trip just now. First, he said he was fine with it and told me to study for my O level (which was a few weeks ago) then just now he told me that with all the natural disaster going on and its best that I cancel the trip and organize a chalet instead.

I was too tired to give him any response. First he had my hopes up high and thought it was a dream come true but now..

I am not feeling really angry or sad about it. I guess I am just too sick n tired with all the stress and studies I am facing right now. Plus, I know he is worried about me.

That reminds me of my fav. quote

"Worrying is like a rocking chair. It gives you something to do but it doesn't get you anywhere."

I have never been THIS stress in my whole entire life before and yet people say life will get even more tougher when we get older!! OMFG.

Compared to O lvl, N lvl is indeed a piece of cake.

God, please end all my misery~

Something new..

Just few days back Peg, Ken, Pojo, Soo, Sy and I went to watch The Ugly Truth. That was my first impression of Gerard Butler and just yesterday when I was watching The Phantom of the Opera with my bro and my impression of him change immediately.

I was surfing the net and wanted find more info about the musical. I wanted to know who really was guy hiding under that mask. And then wah-lah...there came Gerard Butler.

From this...



to...



but i want to remember him as this..







I feel like playing the songs on my Eupho! A few nights ago I dreamt that I was sitting in a band rehearsal with my bro and with Mr Er conducting. Lol, after so many months or maybe even years I still miss Mr Er in band.

I have problem understanding the Musical. The language they use is way too difficult for me to understand. Bro explained to me here and there and telling me that that was the power of love but I still think the Phantom is the bad guy. Hmm, I guess the movie is too complex for my understanding.

I want to watch it again after my O level and most importantly, I want to brush up my English.

Time is running out.


Aaaaadiooos

The worst day(s) of my life

O level Preliminary NO MORE. This is one of the most disappointing exams I had. I had screwed up all my papers and even gave up Art. After taking Math paper 2 I had ZERO confidence for the rest of the paper. Math was the only paper that I have been working on and I thought if that ONE paper didn't make it, what makes me think I'm going to do well for the subjects that I barely spend time to revise?

Yesterday only 6 Art students did the Art paper and I know very well that the rest of us are in deep shit. Deep smelly shit. As good as cow dung.

I think I have spend enough time on Art for the past few months and I am too lazy to do the extra work. In other words, I am sick of art.

As for my results, I wouldn't be surprise if I got 6 F9.

When people see my results they may start asking me why I wanted to come for Sec 5 and take O level. The answer is : Privilege.

I wanted to know how it is like to be in a ''higher position'' (can't find a word to describe it. I have limited vocabulary). The school has always given privilege to the O level and express students . And as far as I know, the special treatment is much ''special'' than the ''special'' treatment given to the N level students. They are not treated the same say.

The first day I came to school my form teachers came and told us to study hard and take our N levels and go to ITE. At that time, I didn't know that there was something called N level. All my cousins took O level and none of my aunt and uncles said..''Girl, study hard for your N level'' NONE. And I was the first to have all that.

There were so many things I hated about being an N level student at that time. I felt that my family members treat me differently. I felt like I was the fattest and the stupidest kid in the family. I felt like I was being looked down upon and I never really talk to them about my studies.

I know that deep down Daddy felt disappointed because I didn't make to express. He knew that I was not good in my studies and at one point (during my N level) he even told me that ITE was good in enough for me! I am his daughter I know every well that he didn't want me to go to ITE. Not that its not good but he thought that it will be better that if I go to a poly. I felt very sad and I felt that I was a disgrace to the family. But then again, if it wasn't for that conversation, I guess I wouln't study hard and make to O levels.

I have been a N(A) student for as long as I am in SQSS and I really hate it (or should I say jealous) when only the express students gets the better and more experience teacher. Not that I doubt their qualification but it has always been this way. Whatever excursions we had, the express students are often the first who get their share. I really wonder why.

Sad. I will never want to go through all that shit ever again. And ever since sec one I told myself I ''die-die'' must make it to Sec 5. That was my goal then. And I have never really thought that I will get any further education or even get to a poly.

That's the problem with me. I set goals that ''half way plan''. I really don't know where am I heading to now. Looking at my results, I guess I will need to retake my O level

Anyway, about the school, I feel much better now. I feel more WANTED. I seriously do. We are given the best classroom and facilities. What more can I ask for? I love the school now.

My Future

I was walking home from school the other day I thought about my ambition, the jobs I want bla bla.. I realise that my dream jobs are as ridicules as any 7 year old kid. The list of my dream jobs..

1. Fashion Designer (Clothes for the voluptuous women. Then maybe I will name my shop Voluptuous Beauty but this will mean that I cannot lose weight. I have to be the role model for my customers). I really want to lose weight!

Bro told me that this was the most realistic job and then maybe I can go to Napfa and study Fashion Design or something like that.

2. Prank Show Producer (Singaporeans need some fun. If I were make a show I will definitely include Shifa Teo)!

3. Photographer (Very common)

4. Vet (As usual)


I am really looking in Option 2 but I don't want to join the course in poly. Media stuff.. I will be bored to death!

Moving on...

Peggy say I am Lao Ren because of my lifestyle and the things that I eat. These are some of my early symptoms.

1. Despite my weight, my favourite food is Fish soup with rice.

2. I like staying at home.

3. I listen to oldies song.

4. I like reading newspaper.

I really like listening to oldies songs. The lyrics are beautifully written and they often reminds me that sometimes, somethings are just as nice when they are simple. Simplicity is best.

Peace out.

Change

Aunty Gina is going back to Philippines soon and Jie jie Catherine told me that her sister is not taking over her anymore. Initially, Aunty Gina and Mama made plans for Aunty Gina's daughter to come to Singapore. She wanted to work in Singapore and thought that she could replace Aunty Gina since Jie jie Catherine will still be around and the both and can look after Mama and Lynnette jie jie but things didn't go according to plan. Jiejie Catherine's sister lost her birth-cert and without it she will not be allowed to work here. That means a ''completely new maid'' will be taking over..I don't really look forward to it.

Aunty Gina has been with us for almost 20 years now and only she knows Mama and Lynnette jiejie best. So sad. I wish she could stay with us forever and ever. I wish she can be a Singaporean and rich enough to send her whole family to Singapore and live here for good. I will miss all her delicious food.. She is just like my 2nd Mama.

People come and people go. That's life. We have to learn to accept it.

I have been listening to Sentimental Hits Cd (Oldies songs) a lot lately and I really love the song If u leave me now by Chicago-





Oldies songs always remind me of all the maids who have taken good care of me for the past 17 years. They used to play oldies songs at home (esp. MLTR). I wish I can go and visit all of them in the Philippines one day. They are the ones who yang me until BAI BAI PANG PANG. ('oo')

Adios

Quick update

I am having my one week September holiday now. It is not much of a holiday as I need to work very hard for the coming prelim. As for the prelim, I don't expect much. I just want to do my best for every subject (including art). I am almost ''booked'' for the whole of this week. Mostly for studies of course. I really hope to do well.

Anyway, I just told Daddy about my disappointing MT result a few days ago. He seems to be quite satisfied. He thought 5 was good enough and that really made me think twice about ''retaking'' MT. My father knows me best and if he thinks that 5 is good enough why should I ''retake''? I don't know if I made the right decision or not but I have submitted my name already and I guess there is no turning back unless I don't turn up for the actual day. Lol.

My daddy is the best of best daddy in world. Love him to bits. I was watch Get Real on CNA with him in the living room just now and the show was about parents being abandoned by their children. He asked me if I would do the same in future and of course I told him I wouldn't. (Who in their right mind would say the would?) I told him that I will buy him a sexy Ferrari (provided if he can fit in), a nice condominium, all flavour Wan wan biscuits available and this favourite pokka green tea...

I had a really really fun time with XJT Peg SY Luk Ken WL CS today. Thanks to Ms fu for guiding the us in Chem for almost four hours. Pictures are on facebook and I am too lazy to upload the pictures.

Nonetheless, here are the pictures we took during my tutor's 21st birthday and also pictures of my dream dog I saw this afternoon at Tou Guan. I had a smilar one on Nintendo Ds Lite but it got corrupted and my beautiful dog disappeared into the cyber world. I love u, lucky. (Yea.. of all names I decided to name it Lucky. Just in case the game can't detect any difficult names).







Craziest match EVER! My Pinky Room. Was choosing my outfit for the birthday theme and I came out with this set of outfit, inspired my Ms Low Xu an Le.


THE CUTEST DOG EVERRRR...








ADIOS